The Seventh Atelier seeks a highly motivated (and slightly unhinged) individual to assist Professor Eldrin Nightshade in his tireless pursuit of alchemical enlightenment.

Responsibilities:

• Assist in the preparation of experimental elixirs (may involve bubbling, glowing, or temporary sentience).

• Maintain a semblance of order in a laboratory prone to spontaneous transmutations.

• Decipher ancient texts (may be written in languages unknown to mortal man).

• Source rare ingredients (may require travel to exotic locales and/or negotiation with questionable entities).

• Manage the Professor's self-stirring teacup collection (delicate work; clumsiness not tolerated).

• Occasional monster wrangling (mostly small, mischievous imps, but must be comfortable with the occasional errant golem).

• Keep the Professor from accidentally turning himself into a newt (again).

Qualifications:

• A high tolerance for strange smells and unexpected explosions.

• Ability to follow instructions, even when said instructions involve phrases like "a pinch of stardust" and "shaken...not stirred."

• Excellent problem-solving skills, particularly in situations involving escaped experiments and/or existential crises.

• Must be able to distinguish between a rare herb and a particularly vibrant weed.

• A love of tea is a plus (especially if you don't mind it self-stirring).

• No fear of the unknown (or of things that go "plorp" in the night).

Benefits:

• Opportunity to witness groundbreaking (and possibly universe-altering) alchemical discoveries.

• A generous supply of experimental elixirs (effects may vary; side effects may include temporary levitation, enhanced storytelling abilities, and an inexplicable urge to wear purple).

• The chance to work in a truly unique and intellectually stimulating environment.

• Flexible hours (mostly; occasional late nights due to unexpected breakthroughs or magical emergencies).

• All the tea you can drink.

To Apply:

Please submit a resume, a cover letter explaining why you're the right kind of eccentric for this position, and a sample of your best (and safest) alchemical creation (if applicable). Be prepared for a… unique interview.